The Secret Read online

He shrugged. “I didn’t feel like it.”

  He wasn’t telling her the truth, of course. Cameron had been wrong; Judith wasn’t his woman, but he had liked the sound of it too much to take exception. Lord, he was weary to be thinking such foolish thoughts. “Come inside,” lain ordered again, his voice a bit more gruff than he’d intended.

  She shook her head and turned her gaze to the ground.

  “What’s this?” he demanded. He forced her face up with the back of his hand under her chin.

  “I don’t wish to go inside.”

  She’d sounded downright pitiful. He tried not to smile. “Why not?” he asked.

  She shrugged. He gently squeezed her jaw. She knew he wouldn’t let up on her until she’d given him a proper answer. “I just don’t want to go where I’m not wanted,” she whispered. His smile was filled with tenderness. She suddenly felt like crying. Her eyes were already getting misty. “I’m overly exhausted this evening,” she excused.

  “But that isn’t the reason you wish to stay out here, is it?”

  “I just explained . . . I was humiliated,” she blurted out. “I know I shouldn’t take his dislike personally. All the Highlanders hate the English, and most of the English hate the Scots, even the border Scots . . . and I hate all the hatred. It’s . . . ignorant, Iain.”

  He nodded agreement. Some of the bluster went out of her. It was difficult to stay outraged when he wasn’t arguing with her.

  “Did he frighten you?”

  “His anger did,” she admitted. “It was most unreasonable. Or am I overreacting again? I’m too weary to know.”

  She was exhausted. He hadn’t paid enough attention, or he certainly would have noticed the dark smudges under her eyes before now. She had taken hold of his hand when she’d admitted she’d felt humiliated, and she still hadn’t let go.

  Yes, Judith looked tired, defeated too, and utterly beautiful to him.

  She suddenly straightened her shoulders. “You must go inside. I’ll be happy to wait out here.”

  He smiled as he pulled his hand away from hers. “But I’d be happier if you went inside with me,” he announced.

  He was through discussing the topic. He threw his arm around her shoulders, gave her a little squeeze, and then dragged her along with him toward the doorway.

  “You said you might be overreacting once again,” he remarked as he hauled her along. He was deliberately ignoring the fact that she was acting like a stiff board. The woman had a stubborn streak in her nature. That flaw amused him. No other woman had ever appeared to be disgruntled with him, but Judith was quite different from all the women he’d known in the past. She was glaring at him every other minute, or so it seemed. He found her reactions refreshingly honest. She didn’t have to try to impress him, and she sure as hell didn’t have it in her nature to cower away from him, either. Odd, but her uninhibited behavior freed him. He didn’t have to act the laird over a submissive subject with Judith. The fact that she was an outsider seemed to break the bindings of traditions pressed upon him as leader of his clan.

  lain had to force himself back to the question nagging him. “When was the first time you overreacted?” he asked.

  “When you kissed me.”

  They’d reached the opening when she whispered that admission. He came to a dead stop and grabbed hold of her. “I don’t understand,” he said. “How did you overreact?”

  She could feel her face heating up. She shrugged his arm away from her shoulder. “You were obviously angry with me . . . after, and that made me angry, too. I shouldn’t have cared,” she added with a firm nod.

  She didn’t wait to gain his reaction to her outburst of honesty. She hurried inside. The older woman she’d noticed standing in the shadows came forward to greet her. Her smile seemed genuine to Judith, and some of the tension went out of her shoulders when she smiled back.

  Margaret was a pretty woman. The creases edged in her brow and around the corners of her mouth didn’t take away from her appeal. She had lovely green-colored eyes with flecks of gold in them, and thick brown hair streaked through with strands of gray. She’d fashioned a braid at the nape of her neck. Although the woman was a good foot taller than Judith, she wasn’t at all intimidating. Kindness radiated from the woman.

  “Thank you for allowing me to come into your home,” Judith said after she’d completed a curtsy.

  Margaret wiped her hands on the white apron she wore around her middle before returning the curtsy. “If you’ll take your seat at the table, I’ll finish getting our supper ready.”

  Judith didn’t want to sit with the men. Iain had already joined the group, and Cameron was leaning across the table pouring him a gobletful of wine. Judith’s stomach immediately tightened. She took a quick breath to calm herself. A single cup of wine wasn’t going to turn lain mean . . . was it? This reaction was absolutely ridiculous, she told herself. And uncontrollable. Her stomach was aching as though she’d swallowed fire. lain wasn’t at all like Tekel. He wouldn’t turn ugly. He wouldn’t.

  lain happened to glance up. He took one look at Judith and knew something was terribly wrong. The color had left her face. She looked as though she was in a panic about something. He was about to get up from the table to find out what was troubling her when he realized she was staring at the jug of wine.

  What in God’s name had gotten into her?

  “Judith? Did you wish to drink some—”

  She vehemently shook her head. “Wouldn’t water be more . . . refreshing after such a long day’s journey?”

  He leaned back. What they drank seemed damned important to her. He didn’t have the faintest idea why, and he guessed that didn’t really matter. She was obviously upset. If the woman wanted them to drink water, then they would drink water.

  “Yes,” he agreed. “Water would be more refreshing.”

  Her shoulders slumped with relief.

  Brodick noticed her reaction too. “We’ll be getting up early, Cameron,” he said, though his gaze was locked on Judith. “We won’t drink wine until we’re home.”

  Margaret had heard the conversation, too. She hurried over to the table with a pitcherful of fresh spring water. Judith carried over more goblets.

  “Sit yourself down and rest,” Margaret told her.

  “I would rather help you,” Judith replied.

  Margaret nodded. “Fetch that stool and sit by the hearth. You can stir the stew while I see to cutting the bread.”

  Judith was relieved. The men were in discussion now, and from the frowns they wore, she assumed it was an important topic. She didn’t want to interrupt. More importantly, she didn’t want to sit next to Cameron, and the only empty stool was at the end of the table, on Cameron’s left.

  Judith carried the stool from against the wall over to the hearth to follow Margaret’s instructions. She noticed that the woman kept giving her covert glances. She obviously wanted to speak to her, but must have been concerned about her husband’s reaction. She kept glancing over to the table to see if Cameron was paying them any attention.

  “We rarely get company,” Margaret whispered.

  Judith nodded. She watched Margaret peek over at her husband again, then turn back to her.

  “I’m curious as to why you’re wanting to go to the Maitlands’ home,” she whispered next.

  Judith smiled. “My friend married a Maitland and requested that I come for the birthing of her first child,” she answered, keeping her voice as whisper-soft as Margaret’s had been when she asked her question.

  “How did you ever meet?” Margaret wanted to know.

  “At the festival on the border.”

  Margaret nodded. “We have the same festivals in the Highlands, though it comes in the fall and not the spring.”

  “Have you ever attended?”

  “When Isabelle still lived with us we went,” Margaret answered. “Cameron’s been too busy to go since,” she added with a shrug. “I always had a fine time.”

  “I unde
rstand Isabelle’s married to Brodick’s brother,” Judith said. “Was it a recent wedding?”

  “No, over four years ago now,” Margaret answered.

  The sadness in Margaret’s voice was most evident. Judith quit stirring the meaty stew and leaned back from the fire so she could give Margaret her full attention. Odd, but although they were virtual strangers, she felt the urge to comfort the woman. She seemed to be terribly lonely, and Judith well understood that feeling.

  “Haven’t you had time to go and visit your daughter?”

  “Not once have I seen my Isabelle since she wed,” Margaret answered. “The Maitlands stay to themselves. They don’t take to outsiders.”

  Judith couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “But you’re certainly not an outsider,” she protested.

  “Isabelle belongs to Winslow now. It wouldn’t be proper to ask that she come to visit us, and it wouldn’t be proper either to ask to go to her.”

  Judith shook her head. She’d never heard of anything so preposterous. “Does she send messages to you?”

  “Who would bring them?”

  A long minute passed in silence. “I would,” Judith whispered.

  Margaret looked over at her husband, then turned her gaze back to Judith. “You would do that for me?”

  “Of course.”

  “I’m worrying it wouldn’t be proper,” Margaret said.

  “Of course it would be proper,” Judith argued. “It wouldn’t be difficult, either, Margaret. If you have any messages you’d like me to give Isabelle, I promise I’ll find her and give them to her. Then, on my way back to England, I’ll give you her messages. Perhaps there will even be an invitation to visit,” she added.

  “We’re going outside to see about the horses, wife,” Cameron announced in a booming voice. “Shouldn’t take us any time at all. Supper almost ready?”

  “Aye, Cameron,” Margaret answered. “It will be on the table when you come back inside.”

  The men left the cottage. Cameron shut the door behind them. “Your husband sounded angry,” Judith remarked.

  “Oh, no, he’s not angry,” Margaret rushed out. “He’s a little nervous, though. It’s quite an honor to have the Maitland laird in our home. Cameron will be boasting about this for a good month or two.”

  Margaret set the treachers on the table, then added another jug of water. The bread was sliced into wedges. Judith helped her ladle the stew into a large wooden bowl and put it in the center of the long table.

  “Perhaps, during our supper, you could ask Brodick how Isabelle is doing,” Judith suggested.

  Margaret looked appalled. “It would be an insult for me to ask,” she explained. “If I ask if she’s happy, then I’m suggesting Winslow isn’t making her happy. Do you see how complicated it is?”

  It wasn’t complicated, it was ridiculous in Judith’s estimation. She could feel herself getting angry on Margaret’s behalf. The Maitlands were being cruel-hearted with such an attitude. Didn’t any of them have any compassion for relatives like mothers and fathers?

  She didn’t know what she would do if someone told her she could never see her aunt Millicent and uncle Herbert again. She got all misty-eyed just thinking about it.

  “If you were to ask . . .” Margaret smiled at Judith while she waited for her to catch on.

  Judith nodded. “Brodick might think that because I’m English, I don’t know any better.”

  “Yes.”

  “I’ll be happy to ask, Margaret,” she promised. “Are all the clans in the Highlands like the Maitlands? Do they all isolate themselves from outsiders?”

  “The Dunbars and the Macleans do,” Margaret answered. “When they aren’t fighting with each other, they stay to themselves,” she explained. “The Dunbar holding sits between the Maitlands and the Macleans, and Cameron tells me they’re constantly fighting over land rights. None of them attend the festivals, but all the other clans do. Are all the English like you?”

  Judith tried to concentrate on what Margaret was asking. It was a difficult task, for she was still reeling from the woman’s casual remark that the Macleans were the Maitlands’ enemies.

  “Milady?” Margaret asked. “Are you feeling ill?”

  “Oh, I’m feeling very well,” Judith replied. “You asked me if I was like all the other English, didn’t you?”

  “I did,” Margaret replied, frowning over the notice that her guest’s complexion had turned so pale.

  “I don’t know if I’m like the others or not,” Judith answered. “Tis a fact I’ve led a rather sheltered life. Margaret, how in heaven’s name do the men ever find mates if they never mingle with the other clans?”

  “Oh, they have their ways,” Margaret answered. “Winslow came here to barter for a speckled mare. He met Isabelle and took to her right away. I was set against the union because I knew I’d never see my daughter again, but Cameron wasn’t going to listen to me. Besides, you don’t say no to a Maitland, leastways I’ve never heard of anyone trying, and Isabelle had her heart set on marrying Winslow.”

  “Does Winslow look like Brodick?”

  “Aye, he does. He’s much more quiet, though.”

  Judith burst into laughter. “Then he must be dead,” she remarked. “Brodick rarely speaks a word.”

  Margaret couldn’t stop herself from chuckling. “They’re a strange breed, the Maitlands are, but in their defense I’ll tell you that if ever Cameron came under attack or needed any true assistance, he would only have to send word to Laird lain.

  “Before the marriage, every now and again a couple of our sheep would disappear. The thievery stopped as soon as word went out that our Isabelle married a member of the Maitland clan. Cameron’s gained new respectability, too. Of course, his initial reaction to meeting you might have changed that status.”

  “Do you mean his surprise to find out I was English?”

  “Aye, he was surprised all right.”

  The two women looked at each other and suddenly burst into laughter just as the men returned to the cottage. Iain was the first to walk inside. He nodded to Margaret, then paused to give Judith a frown. She guessed he didn’t think her amusement was proper behavior. That possibility made her laugh all the more.

  “Go and take your place at the table,” Margaret instructed.

  “Aren’t you joining us?”

  “I’ll serve first, then I’ll join you.”

  Whether she realized it or not, she’d just given Judith an excuse not to sit next to Cameron. The men had all taken their same positions. Judith picked up the stool near the hearth and carried it over to the other side of the table. Then she nudged her way between Iain and Brodick.

  If the warriors were surprised by her boldness, they didn’t let on. Brodick even moved over so she wouldn’t be crowded.

  They ate in silence. Judith waited until the men had finished before bringing up the topic of Isabelle’s welfare.

  She decided to ease into the discussion. “Margaret, this was a fine stew.”

  “Thank you,” Margaret replied with a faint blush.

  Judith turned to Brodick. “Do you see your brother very often?”

  The warrior glanced down at her, then shrugged.

  “Do you see his wife, Isabelle?” she prodded.

  He shrugged again. She nudged him under the table with her foot. He raised an eyebrow over that boldness. “Did you just kick me?”

  So much for trying to be subtle, Judith thought. “Yes, I did kick you.”

  “Why?”

  lain asked that question. She turned to smile at him. “I didn’t want Brodick to shrug at me again. I want him to talk about Isabelle.”

  “But you don’t even know the woman,” lain reminded her.

  “I wish to learn about her,” Judith argued.

  lain looked like he thought she’d lost her mind. She let out a sigh. Then she started drumming her fingertips on the tabletop.

  “Tell me about Isabelle, please,” she asked Brodic
k again.

  He ignored her.

  She let out a sigh. “Brodick, would you please step outside with me for just a minute? I wish to say something terribly important to you in private.”

  “No.”

  She couldn’t restrain herself. She kicked him again. Then she turned to lain. She missed Brodick’s quick grin. “Iain, please order Brodick to step outside with me.”

  “No.”

  She drummed her fingertips on the tabletop again while she considered her next ploy. She looked up, caught Margaret’s pitiful expression, and determined then and there that even if she looked the fool, she would get her way.

  “All right then,” she announced. “I’ll just have to talk to Brodick tomorrow on our journey. I’ll ride with you,” she added with an innocent smile. “I’ll probably talk from sunup to sundown, too, Brodick, so you’d better get your rest tonight.”

  That threat carried substance. Brodick shoved himself away from the table and stood up. The scowl on his face was scorching. He made it apparent to everyone at the table that he was angry.

  Judith wasn’t angry. She was furious. God’s truth, she couldn’t wait to get the insensitive clod outside. She forced a smile and even managed a curtsy to her host before turning and walking out the doorway. She kept right on smiling, too, when she turned and pulled the door closed behind her.

  In her haste to blister Brodick, she forgot about the two windows on either side of the door.

  Margaret and Gowrie were seated with their backs to the door, but lain and Alex had a clear view of the grassy area outside the windows.

  Needless to say, everyone’s curiosity was caught. Gowrie half turned on his stool to see what was going on.

  Iain kept his attention centered on Brodick. The warrior faced him. He stood with his legs braced apart and his hands clasped behind his back. He wasn’t trying to hide his irritation from Judith, either. Brodick had a fierce temper. lain knew the warrior wouldn’t touch Judith, no matter how angry she made him, but he could hurt her with a few cruel remarks.

  Iain waited to see if he needed to intervene. The last thing he needed tonight was a weeping woman on his hands, and Brodick was almost as good at intimidating tactics as he was.